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if you're happy and you know it clap your hands . . .

hello there.... hmMMmmMmMm... soooooooo, where was i?

monday
after all that i already wrote about... i talked to miss valerie online and on the phone for a bit. then darren calls and tells me he's outside.. haha. so then we ate nachos and cheEEeEEse for a bit. then he took me to my lesson. =) thanks love of my life.. hehe.
after my lesson.. went home.. then darren calls again. tells me to go to q's and he's gonna pick me up. so he comes wth christal and i drive to kat's! =) then we go to tcby. and dru let me drive his car! .. hehe, he gave me a lesson in driving it.
then we were off to q's.. watched *empire*.. then went home.. isssssssues, but it's ok. =/

tuesday
SIX FLAGS! =).. ya'll were there.. so you know what happened.. haha.. as in, i'm too lazy to type it all! hehe.. i got a text from kkkkeith hehehhehee.... too bad you have school =/...
the rides we went on.. viper, psyclone, dejavu, x, scream, and goliath.. =)
waited in line for x for like ten million hours.. but it was fun.. =) scream is the new ride, went on it twice cause there was no line..
ummm.. ate ate mooseburger lodge and kris carved stuff in the table! aaaah... hehe. me and cat saw kris going peepee!!! haha, then took pictures with our beautiful antler straws..
ate funnel cakes.. yuMmmMMmy..
stufffffff.. then make-up... then stuffffff again.. *sigh* then talked to cat about her stuffffff, and as usual she made me cry cause i hate to see her cry!.. then talked to kris about it in the car.. and someone assumed stuff that wasn't true, so there was some misunderstandings.. but it's aaaaaall good.
on the way home.. me and cat wanted to listen to *never again*.. haha, i think we were all listening to it at the same time... got to lauren's.. rented *next friday* at blockbuster.. then went to dru's.. turned out to be *drumline*.. watched it and fell asleep =) woke up to ate's call.. then fell asleep again.. then went home.

wednesday
woke up to trish's call... kundirana meeting...
picked me up then we practiced.. q came!! =) hehe..
then jo and des took me and claire to lorean's.. talked for a bit and waited to her to get ready..
then we got boba, and went to citrus to meet ate..
went to the studio but it was FULL again! poooooooper scooper!.. but we still get paid. that sucks though, i wanted to go =/
so we said bye to kim and her friends.. and we went to the glendale galleria again. ate bulgogi at seoul grindz again.... =) gooOOoooOd tummy luvin! =) then went in the mall and went to build-a-bear.. ate got a new bear.. hehe this time she wanted a girl.. we named it naelani aryelle.. i told her to name it ariel since she loves the little mermaid.. and she wanted to spell it that way. dressed her up in a hula outfit.. SO CUTE!.. it has a grass skirt and a coconut bra and leis!! sooo cute!!! hehe..
then we went back to ate's and talked foreverrrr.. and jocelyn took us home..
then i probably talked to darren but i can't remember... haha.. i'm getting all the days mixed up.. =/ hehe

thursday
darren called at like 8:30 in the freaaaaakin morning.. oh yeah! now i remember.. i did talk to silly on the phone wed night.. and i ended up falling asleep while we talked about thursday. hehe... =)
so anyway.. he came and got to his house around 9..downloaded songs that i needed to learn and stuff... then he cooked us brunch =) tummy luvin hehe.. i didn't eat the pancakes though.. haha, that was funnnnnnnny... =)
watched tv.. then we left to go to brea mall.. walked around but i was so tired... saw tram working.. then walked around more and saw janet my hot momma.. hehe...
then we talked in the parking lot of millie's.. then we went in cause i had to go pee.. and cause we wanted to eat.. DUH! hehe jp.
MMmmMmmMmmMmMMm that was some good tummy luvin..
then talked more.. which was good.. we're learning.. =)
spent like more than half of the day together.. with just us.. which we both think we really needed... i love you silly silly...

song of the day : brian mcknight - love of my life

First, first time I looked into your eyes
I saw heaven, oh, heaven in your eyes
Everything I did before you, wasn’t worth my while
It should’ve been you all the time
I do anything, and everything to please you
You know how much I need you
You’re always, always, on my mind

You’re more than wonderful
More than amazing
Irreplaceable, love, love, in my life
You’re so incredible, here in these arms tonight
The irreplaceable, love, love, of my life

Always, seems like reality
Forever, don’t seem so far away
All I wanna do, all I wanna feel, all I wanna be is close to you
Everyday, is my lucky day
All I wanna do, is love you
I place no one above you
I’ll tell you why

You’re more than wonderful
More than amazing
The irreplaceable, love, love, in my life
You’re so incredible, here in these arms tonight
The irreplaceable, love, love, of my life

Baby you know, you know you’re my one and only
All I wanna do is be together
Sugar you know, I’ll never leave you lonely
In your eyes, in your eyes I see forever
Ahhhh, ohhhh, ohhh, ohhhhh,
Ahhhhh, ohhhhhh, ohhhh,

You’re more than wonderful
More than amazing
The irreplaceable, love, love, in my life
You’re so incredible, here in these arms tonight
The irreplaceable, love, love, of my life


quotes of the day
*um, how about we just go out to eat?* . . .
*what kind of heck?*
*does it run when it hurts?*
all by darren, hehe.. =)

byebye everyone.. =)

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i dedicate this to two very special people.. you know who you are, cause i stole it from your journal!! hehehe =)

** What is LOVE? **

It`s having sOmeOne tO be with
SomeOne yOu can`t be withOut
It`s wanting tO hOld them every secOnd
THat`s what its all abOut.

It`s the happiness yOu feel
When everything`s gOne wrOng
It`s the way yOu sit there
And think of crazy lOve sOngs.

It`s the sadness in yOur heart
When yOu knOw they`re nOt there
It`s the safeness yOu have
When yOu are feeling scared.

It`s the hOpe yOu have
When everything`s gOne
It`s the dreams yOu hOld
When yOu`re alOne.

It`s having sOmeOne tO talk tO
When nO-one else is listening
It`s being sO in lOve
That nOthing in yOUr life is missing.

It`s knOwing I lOve yOu
And I`ll lOve yOu fOrever
It`s thinking of yOu every secOnd
That`s what lOve truly is!

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

is it just coincidence that everytime something f*cking happens.. this song just has to be playing? maybe it's some sort of sign. i don't know.

f*ck that.
cry me a f*ckin river.

song of the day : frankie j - don't wanna try

i cant believe you had the nerve to say the things you said
they hurt so bad that they ended our relationship
i cant believe it
four years go down the drain
oh how i wish things would have happened so differently
i tried to save it so many times but you still couldnt see
you kept insistin and resistin that you would not fall again
and now you tryin to tell me that your sorry
and your tryin to come back home
your tellin me you really need me
crying beggin both knees are on the floor
but baby i

dont wanna try
dont wanna try
dont wanna try no more
you keep insisting
when you know our love is out the door
dont wanna try
dont wanna try
cause all we do is fight and say the things
i hurt you bad to when we both begin to cry
dont wanna try
dont wanna try
i bout just had enough its been a rough road
baby just let it go
dont wanna try
dont wanna try
dont wanna try no more
tell me whats the use of holdin on
when all we do is hurt our love

you and i had many conversations on the telephone
talks about one day we having a place of our own
wake up in the morning and have breakfast ready on the table
but all of that just seems so far away from me
had to wake up face reality
it all just seem to good to be true after all you put me through
and now you tryin to tell me that ur sorry
and you tryin to come back home
you tellin me that you really need me
crying beggin both knees are on the floor
but baby i

dont wanna try
dont wanna try
dont wanna try no more
you keep insisting
when you know our love is out the door
dont wanna try
dont wanna try
cause all we do is fight and say the things
i hurt you bad to when we both begin to cry
dont wanna try
dont wanna try
i bout just had enough its been a rough road
baby just let it go
dont wanna try
dont wanna try
dont wanna try no more
tell me whats the use of holdin on
when all we do is hurt our love

dont wanna try
dont wanna try
dont wanna try no more
dont wanna try
dont wanna try


dont wanna try
dont wanna try
dont wanna try no more
dont wanna try
dont wanna try
dont wanna try no more

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candy, anyone?

yuMmaY!.. know what i ate yesterday?... twix, snickers, reeses, milky way, 3 musketeers, hersheys, starburst... etc. =) can you say *tummy luvin*?... =) =) =) oh and sprite! =) i haven't had boba and starbucks yet though.... but it's ok. *sigh*.. fatness here i come. . . =)

HAPPY . BELATED . EASTER ! ! ! ! ! !
HAPPY . BELATED . BIRTHDAY . ASHLEY ! ! ! ! ! !

hehe so i left off on saturday
hmMmmMM... did pretty much nothing but eat and sleep in the morning. and watch tv too.. hehe. then at like 2, we left to go buy our season passes for six flags. then we were on our way to citrus to meet everyone there. got there and rode with ate, claire, mayumi, and cat. in the other car was melissa, anthony, val, christal, and jon... and off we were to watch the taping for *rock me baby*.. remember cole from *MaRtiN*?.. yeah, he's on that show too..
the taping was fun.. can't really remember cause i'm really tired right now.. but yeah... =)
after the taping... we went to alberto's.. hehe ate said it'll be our new tradition to go there... hehe we got super nachos again!.. yumMMMmmMmMaY! then went home.

easter sunday.. woke up. took a shower. got ready to go to mass. my tito's church has mass at this one park every year... so yeah, had mass.. then after mass, we ate and did the usual stuff... saw my little cousins again.. but i shouldn't call them little anymore cause they're getting SO BIG! =). but chloe and shea weren't there.. don't know why. but they just came back from hawaii last week so maybe they're tired.. i don't know.
egg-hunting.. then more games.. ate more candy... =) they wanted me to sing, but i didn't have an instrumental with me so toooooo bad.. hehe jp.
then we left cause we ahd to go to a family reunion at my grandma's cousin's daughter's house.. yep =).. in downey.
met people that are somehow related to me.. then my aunt made me sing. i told her i didn't have an instrumental.. but she said, "then sing with the cd"... so they just made it really low and i had to sing for them.. their karaoke thing was broken and their mic was broken too.. so i was like.. "can i just hold the mic and pretend it's working?".. hehe.. but i didn't..
they have big houses over there!.. they're all one story, but they're big... and pretty.
i wanted to jump in the pool cause there was a slide.. hehe.
well anyway.. ate more.. and kiana and ryan and malia were there.. played with them.
my aunt wanted us to come home with them so we could take care of the kids.. but claire said.. "we can't, cause were going somewhere".. and my aunt goes "where?"... and claire said "ummm... somewhere!"
haha, she couldn't tell her six flags, cause that's where they live!.. hehe.
we would take care of them though.. but yeah.... it's ok. they can just stay with us! hehe. i wanna record there though... cause my uncle has a recording studio thing at their house there.. ehhh... i'm lazy. =)
anyWAY.. played.. ate.. talked.. christine forgot my tape AGAIN!.. mike knows about darren now.. haha, he kept asking me questions about him.. haha..
then we left and got home .. called darren.. went to sleep.

monday
today..
woke up.. watched *abandon* with claire..
[wow.. it's sunny.. hehe sorry, i just looked out the window]
then.. darren called.. talked for like two seconds.. now i'm HERE! =)
hehe.. have my lesson later on.. and i think that's about it for today.. heheehe.. fun huh?!

is it just me.. or does it feel like everything's changing.. i don't know, there's just so many up and downs i just don't know what "normal" is anymore! everything seems to be going wrong with one thing in my life, when something else is right. and when that starts to fall apart, then the other is ok.. am i making sense? i don't think so.. but aaaah.. i just don't want everything to fall apart.
don't you hate that feeling when you feel like you'd give so much to a person that doesn't wanna do the same for you? or have you ever even had that feeling? do you understand what i'm saying?
ok... WAIT. i'm stopping myself. all i need to know.. is that i'm living... i'm here. i'm supposed to be here. i'm feeling this way for a reason. and i will get through this. that's all i need to know. b.r.e.a.t.h.e. =)

song of the day : tlc - turntable

I used to walk around like
Nothing could happen to me
Life is a gamble so I
Should live life more carefully
But all I know is that I
Control my own destiny
I used to look at others
Instead of me blaming me


Don’t ask yourself why
Just look to the sky
Believe that soon you’ll see the other side


I know
That through all the struggle
There’s a bright road
At the end of the tunnel
Now you should know
Whatever your dilemma may be
You’ll learn
Life is worth it
Watch the tables turn


Yeah yeah yeah yeah


Whenever you feel troubled
With problems coming your way
Don’t ever get discouraged
There’s always a better day
We all don’t know the answers
Believe and trust when I say
That havin' faith is always
The way to make things okay


Don’t ask yourself why
Just look to the sky
Believe that soon you’ll see the other side


I know
That through all the struggle
There’s a bright road
At the end of the tunnel
Now you should know
Whatever your dilemma may be
You’ll learn
Life is worth it
Watch the tables turn


That’s right
Alright


You’ve had your ups and downs but
It happened for a reason
Cause after April showers
There will come a change of season
So please don’t give up now cuz
The sun's shinin' through the clouds
It’s gonna be alright
I know


I know
That through all the struggle
There’s a bright road
At the end of the tunnel
Now you should know
Whatever your dilemma may be
You’ll learn
Life is worth it
Watch the tables turn


I know
That through all the struggle
There’s a bright road
At the end of the tunnel
Now you should know
Whatever your dilemma may be
You’ll learn
Life is worth it
Watch the tables turn


ok guys.. have a fun break.. hopefully i see AAAAALL of you.. =) if not.. have fun and be safe! =)

special person of the day
*miss valerie albania*
why? cause she is very special.. hehe, and cause i am very proud of her.. =)
luv you val! roro! hehe